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Facing Difficult Emotions: Why Leaning In Is More Powerful Than Avoidance

  • damienclarke92
  • Oct 22
  • 2 min read

In life, we all encounter difficult emotions—grief, anxiety, anger, shame, or sadness. Our natural instinct is often to avoid these feelings, distract ourselves, or push them away. It’s understandable: facing pain is uncomfortable and can feel counterintuitive. Yet, the truth is that leaning into our difficult emotions, rather than running from them, is a far more powerful path to healing and growth.


The Temptation to Avoid

When we experience emotional pain, our minds quickly look for escape routes. We might:

  • Keep ourselves busy with work or social media

  • Numb out with food, alcohol, or other distractions

  • Tell ourselves to “just get over it” or “think positive”

While these strategies might offer temporary relief, they don’t address the root of our discomfort. In fact, the more we try to outrun our emotions, the more they tend to chase us. Unprocessed feelings can resurface as stress, anxiety, or even physical symptoms.


Why Facing Emotions Works

It may feel counterintuitive, but turning toward our difficult emotions is the key to moving through them. Here’s why:

  • Emotions are Messengers: Our feelings, even the painful ones, carry important information about our needs, values, and experiences.

  • What We Resist, Persists: Avoidance often makes emotions stronger or more persistent over time.

  • Self-Compassion Heals: Allowing ourselves to feel, without judgment, builds resilience and self-acceptance.

  • We Can’t Outrun Ourselves: No matter how fast we run, our emotions are part of us. Facing them is the only way to truly process and release them.


How to Face Difficult Emotions

  1. Pause and Notice: When you feel discomfort, take a moment to acknowledge it. Name the emotion if you can.

  2. Breathe and Allow: Take a few slow breaths. Remind yourself that it’s okay to feel this way.

  3. Get Curious: Ask yourself, “What is this feeling trying to tell me?” or “What do I need right now?”

  4. Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend in pain.

  5. Reach Out: Sometimes, sharing your feelings with a trusted person or professional can help you process and move forward.





The Power of Acceptance

Facing difficult emotions doesn’t mean wallowing in them or letting them control us. It means accepting that they are a natural part of being human. When we stop running and start listening, we discover that we are stronger and more resilient than we realized.

 
 
 

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